Love

     What is love?  I think almost everyone can say that they have experienced it at some point in their life.  But can anyone give a concrete definition?  1 John 4:8 tells us that God is Love.  The Bible Dictionary also says that charity is the noblest, highest, and strongest kind of love and that it is the pure love of Christ.

     So what is love?  My personal definition is gaining depth with the experiences that I am having with roommates, classmates, and friends.  For example, this last week I've learned that real love is not conditional upon what the other person does.  Their actions do not, or should not determine my love for them.  To illustrate this let me give a scenario.  My friend - Laura - and I are very close.  But every now and then my feelings get hurt by something she says or does.  One day she said something that really bothered me.  It caused me to go into a spiral of anger and frustration.  I eventually began to wonder why we were even friends.  I started thinking about how I could love her after what she had done.

     While in the midst of my pity-party I had somewhat of an epiphany: Laura is my friend independent of her faults and flaws.  I realized that my feelings were hypocritical and selfish.  Laura is a person, a human being with thoughts and feelings and imperfections just like me.  No one should have to live up to my vision of perfection to be worthy of my love.  If they did then love would not make sense, especially the love of a Heavenly Father and Savior.

     Solidifying this experience was the statement quoted to me by a young man in one of my classes.  He said that "true love is desiring and caring for the eternal well-being of another individual."  I think this is one of the greatest definitions that I have heard so far.  Indeed, I believe that any individual who truly loves another person will seek the eternal welfare and happiness of that person unto great personal sacrifice.

    OK, now that I've played around with the definition, I want to pose a question in parting.  If true love is charity, the pure love of Christ, the desire for the eternal welfare of another being...than what distinguishes that from the additional romantic love that is typically felt in a marriage relationship?  And how do you know that you are feeling it over the love of friendship?